Life Stories and Beyond

Our Bodies. Our Families. Our Lives. We all have stories we should share. We're more alike than we know.

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October 21, 2018
lisakunk

16 comments

Lessons From The Empty Nest: Toenail Wisdom From One of The Visiting Birdies

A6D3EC0B-0E95-4034-A535-E86DAE14B757By Lisa Batten Kunkleman

I’m delighted to say, I have neglected my blog lately. Yep, happy because I’ve been busy spending time with those kiddos who fluttered out of the nest. We’ve either visited them or they’ve visited us. It’s been so fantabulous. We’ve gotten our baby bird fix and even learned a few things.  I’ll share a bit of that wisdom now.

I decided to stretch my readers’ minds by showing ya’ll how to cut your toenails inside the house without shooting them all over the room. Our oldest (by one minute) son Joe came up with this idea in a mere instant. He was headed to scoop his cat’s litter box and decided to use the bag as a toenail catcher first before becoming a feline poo recepticle.

Now you see why I’m so proud of my birds. They come up with innovative ideas and then teach their father and me how to use their newfound skills. (My dad taught me to sit on the back steps outside to cut my toenails. Sometimes it was too doggone hot or cold. Sorry Dad.)

I hope you will employ and enjoy7EDADC90-450C-4F4B-B15C-5682A405632C this useful life hack. Now clip those nails without leaving a trace of evidence you’ve been there. Carry on.

5 comments

Using that Hurricane Water Once Again: Thanks to Hurricane Florence

By Lisa Batten Kunkleman

Following Hurricane Matthew, I wrote about reusing our bathtub filled with emergency, hurricane water to wash our hound dog, Sadie.A Bathtub of Hurricane Prep Water? This year, we filled pots and pitchers with water in preparation for the very devastating Hurricane Florence that hit the Carolinas and Virginia.

Not wanting to waste the remaining water, we used it to refill the dogs’ water pot, for washing dishes, and for boiling eggs.

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First, I used the water for the “float test” to determine if the two dozen expired eggs in the fridge were ok. This time, our electricity was only out briefly from the storm; otherwise, there would be no need to test the eggs. If you’re not familiar with the “float test” it is simply placing eggs in water to see if they sink or float. If they float, don’t eat them. They’re better in the compost pile than in your belly. Here’s a brief video of the process.

 

July 30, 2018
lisakunk

13 comments

Long Live Mr. Treehouse: Only Now He’s Mr. Bridge Patio Thingy Over the Stream

By Lisa Batten Kunkleman

After seeing our empty-nester treehouse come down last week, many people from all around shared how they felt the pull of childhood fun coming to an end. End? Never! Transform, yes. We live by rules such as Waste not, want not and all kinds of cliches like that. As we will one day transform like a twinkle of a star, so did Mr. Treehouse. Thanks to Dan the man and his buddies, John and Zane, within forty-eight hours, Mr. Treehouse became a new plaything for young and old alike. He is now useful for woods-walkers who no longer climb like squirrels. On morning walks, I’m sure we’ll enjoy parking on the planks to watch nature more often on Mr. Bridge than we would in Mr. Treehouse. Just because we used-to-could, doesn’t mean we should, right?

So now, for your viewing pleasure, meet Mr. Former Treehouse Now Bridge Patio Thingy. Yes, that’s a long name but just go with it.  We look forward to many years of lounging, dancing, camping, and picnicking on his new form. It’s almost like he had plastic surgery, only for free and without pain medicine. It’s all good. Don’t be sad. He’s pretty happy with his new snazzy self. So are we. Picture lying on a sleeping bag, listening to crickets, frogs and the stream running underneath you. Sounds delightful. The adult kids may never sleep inside again.

July 27, 2018
lisakunk

26 comments

Empty Nest Flutterings: Come on Down, Mr. Treehouse

 

By Lisa Batten Kunkleman

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There comes a time, when the nest is empty, we push back the tears and make room for other things; like hammocks and memories. Today’s the day. Once a sturdy sight for kid’s eyes. Barn red siding, climbing pegs, and a yellow slide, you were a group project and a work of art. A tree house for people and squirrels. Now you’ve done your job, and it’s time to rest. Come on down. We’ll share our memories in the shade of the very same young trees that both supported and later stressed your floorboards, as they grew tall. Welcome to a new season.

 

Don’t worry birdies, if we ever need another tree house, we can build a new one.

To be continued…

 

July 5, 2018
lisakunk

17 comments

Shelling Out Wisdom From the Beach: Hints for writers, parents, or anyone who enjoys playing

 

By Lisa Batten Kunkleman

 

As a writer and parent, I know the importance of inspiration for new ideas. For me, nature and especially the beach are where my five senses heighten like hair standing up in gooseflesh. Thoughts flow in faster than I can put them into long-term memory. Taking photos helps me save those treasured tidbits until I can jot them down.

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We realize you kids know everything but right now you just sit there and listen to older and wiser heads.

 

My latest thoughts whirled around how much the shoreline is filled with diversity. Various colors, shapes, conditions, sizes, and ages of shells, serve as perfect analogies of human lives. On my latest beach trip, I filled an empty trail mix bag with sand and brought it home to use as a backdrop to my seashell wisdom ideas. It was too darn hot for straight thinking, playing in the hot sand in a heat wave, so I opted to play in our air conditioning instead.

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Nothing like a little grit with your sweet and salty.

 

I collected shells of all descriptions. Nearly perfect and broken, old and not so old, plain and colorful. A cross-section of mankind.

 

Back in the cool air, playtime began with a cookie sheet full of sand, the perfect sandbox for shell play. Believe it or not, this sandbox kept my husband and me occupied for quite a while arranging and rearranging our pretend humans in the form of shells. I didn’t tell him it felt like playing with our kids again, making up stories for their dolls or GI Joe’s to act out. Only this time it was with my idea man of a husband.

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No sass needed. Come under the umbrella before you have a heat stroke.

 

I’d arrange the shell people and ask what he thought was happening. Our ideas were often very different which suggests this activity may serve as good prompts for writers or parents. These photos and captions represent only a few of the scenarios we developed.

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I like your natural gray. I wish I had the nerve to go natural. Ready to play Bunco?

 

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Okay you can go in the water but only an inch deep. And you girls hang onto the twins.

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Why do we have to put on more sunscreen?

 

For parents and writers who need to get in out of the heat or stimulate some new ideas, setting up an indoor sandbox is simple and effective. It’s also easy enough to sweep up the wayward sand, so no need to fear a big old mess.

On my morning beach walk, I met a delightful new friend who shared her own shell analogy. She said,”I’ve noticed how even the beautiful, complete shells still have grit inside. I rinse them and it reminds me of how baptism can make us grit free.”

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Morning shelling is relaxation at its best.

 

I’d love for you to share additional caption ideas for these photos or let me know if this spurs your own creativity.

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Seeing our similarities shouldn’t be so hard. We’re all solid citizens and live on the same beach.

 

June 29, 2018
lisakunk

15 comments

Dead Fish or Brunch?

By Lisa Batten Kunkleman

An imperfect circle of dead fish littered the beach near the water’s edge. How sad. I asked another morning walker, “Do you think they were discarded by a surf-fisherman who was using them as bait?”

 

He lifted his brows while widening his eyes and said, “Either that or some sharks were out there having a good time.”

 

“I’ll go with my theory, but thanks for that,” I said as I smiled, turned, and continued my stroll. Beach walkers are such fun folks.   IMG_1302

On my return trek toward my shady umbrella site, I could see from a distance, three seagulls enjoying a fish bait buffet. My smile flattened, as I witnessed a photographer get too close and off they flew. He took his camera and left. That’s what your zoom lens is for, Buddy.

 

I stayed back a ways and watched as one little white gull returned and snagged a bite, only to be scared away by a pack of runners pounding the sand. Poor little gull waded about eight feet away to wait out the traffic.

My mom would say, “Somebody left the gate open,” meaning traffic was heavy. Each time he got up the courage to move in for a taste, another runner zipped by. He retreated again to his safe spot in the shallow water.

 

I wanted to toss him a couple of slimy morsels but he would have flown for sure if I strode that close. The tide was going out but one rogue wave fell just barely far enough to pull back a few tiny, iridescent fish for him to snag and munch on. Nature ruled once again. The fish didn’t die in vain and the little gull had a lovely brunch. I wonder if his buddies were watching.

 

June 26, 2018
lisakunk

22 comments

Distractibility at Its Finest: If You Give a Writer An Idea

 

By Lisa Batten Kunkleman

Distracted as usual from my to do list, I spend far too much time on line reading other people’s blogs and enjoying chats with some of those bloggers. Those conversations, often spur me on to write more blog posts, which is a good thing. I figure I should do so while the ideas are on top of my memory file. Was that clever or confusing?  Blogging would be a good way to spend my time now, except I’m hibernating at the beach for a few days, to work toward finishing my ever-pending book within this decade. Actually, I’ll finish sometime this year if I learn to concentrate.

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“Hey Squirrel, what’s in that feeder?”

 

There is a constant influx of captivating topics that swirl around in my head like clippings under a lawnmower, flinging toward the chute. They have to escape or the machinery becomes clogged. I have to launch that idea out into the grass. I mean the world. Hopefully you get that I’m attempting to make an analogy. Here’s an example of how my blogging mind works.

 

If you give a writer an idea

She’ll need to chew on it

If she chews on it

She’ll need to write it

If she writes it

She’ll need to edit it

If she edits it

She’ll need to share it

If she shares it

She’ll need to monitor it

If she monitors it

She’ll need to respond to responses

If she responds to responses

She’ll get another idea

If she gets another idea

She’ll need to chew on it

 

Now that I got that out of my head, I’ll get to work on the book. Until the next idea takes hold and distractibility wins over.  Then there’s that crowded beach beneath my tenth floor window.  I see one good empty spot near the water where my chair and umbrella would fit between the sea of umbrellas like a puzzle piece.

June 25, 2018
lisakunk

7 comments

What Does Your Eighty Year Old You Want From You Now?

A blogger friend wrote this very thought provoking piece. I must share. The list her 80-year-old self shares with her is right on target for me. I wonder who else it will touch.

Head to Head, Heart to Heart

Imagine you’ve got to eighty years old and you’re as fit as can be expected for your age, with a good mind still intact, and you’re reflecting back on your life. Now I’ve listened to elderly people tell stories of their pasts which function as a kind of celebration of their lives which privilege the listener, with a sense of that person facing the end of their life with equanimity and peace. It’s as if they are ready to face a ‘good death’ and the journey ahead, whatever that may be, with no regrets and a free spirit, along with the conviction that they did the very best they possibly could for themselves and the people they cared about.

And this is the way I want to feel when, or if, I reach this point, because I have also listened to people around this age ruminate on their pasts in…

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June 18, 2018
lisakunk

22 comments

Hershey Nuggets: A surprising Memory Aid

By Lisa Batten Kunkleman

My mother’s memory technique would never work in our house. She uses a kitchen table candy dish filled with dark chocolate Hershey Nuggets for more than maintaining healthy cholesterol levels. If she wants to remind herself to take the trash out to the street, she sets one nugget on the table. Since it’s out of place, in her ultra-organized house, she’ll see it and remember.

There’s no way a wandering piece of candy would work in our house. When our family visits Mom, we’ve ruined her system more than once by putting the candy back in the dish. Well, ok, fine. Sometimes we eat it. So we forget to remember her memory device.

Once when she was trying to remember the exterminator was coming, she said, “You just ate the bug man.” Then she flipped a coaster across the room to leave on the floor as her backup memory plan.

Back when I wore rings, before my menopausal, salt-sensitive fingers started swelling, I used to add my right-hand ring onto my left-hand wedding ring finger. The three ring circles were so annoying, I remembered unwritten items on my to-do list.

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When I’m too lazy write a sticky-note, I use Mom’s method and put an item in a weird place as a memory nudge. For example, I might wonder, Why’s that nasty sneaker on my dresser? Oh, yeah. So I’ll take a walk. It has to be odd to stand out amidst the other out-of-place objects in our house.

I send myself an e-mail reminder, now and then. The problem with that is, my email in-box has 547 unopened emails so the hints the rest of the world already sent smother my reminders. Maybe I should use that reminder app on my phone. I forget to do that.

On a recent visit with Mom, when I spotted a drink coaster on the white carpet between her unoccupied, trendy leather recliner and the kitchen, I bent over to pick it up.   A voice from the adjoining sunroom, said, “Don’t you move my coaster. Remember, tomorrow’s trash day.”

Looking up from her homemade drop-biscuit-strawberry shortcake, she grinned.

“Of course it is. Silly me. Maybe I’ll have a nugget since you’ve switched to coasters.”

 

 

 

May 8, 2018
lisakunk

1 comment

Pre Speech Aphasia Comedy Storytelling: Daddy Was a Talker and Would be 93 Years old Today

Speech aphasia slowed Daddy’s storytelling but here’s a good one from before that happened. Happy 93rd birthday in the great beyond.

Life Stories and Beyond

Goldilocks and the Seven Dwarfs Meet Rudolph With the Big Red Snout

By Lisa Batten Kunkleman

Before strokes and who-knows-what caused speech aphasia leaving Daddy (Papa Carl) with only about twenty-one words, he was a funny fellow. Downright embarrassing to his wife and kids at times with his humor. He liked to watch us squirm.

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A salesman with a women’s apparel and shoe business, and a talker, he was energized by an audience, especially when it included his grandchildren. This video treasure from 1995 popped up from my archives and I just had to share it. I’ll call it:

Goldilocks and the Seven Dwarfs Meet Rudolph With the Big Red Snout

I say, “While you’re standing there, tell Danielle the story of Snow White.”

Papa Carl begins, “Did you know about Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs? There was Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs and they went down the…

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